Frolic unto thy autumn mist

Graduation. A blunt word to utter.

If we had just finished that application last week,
I should be experiencing euphoria right now
If we had just push more and more.
I should be tranquil.

“Jonjon… yOu’re such an ErRatic cRap.”

- Catherine Cabrera
Call Center Supervisor
Convergys Alabang

Maybe she’s right. I’m a bummer.
T’was like yesterday when i heared myself scream.
Waah! Yelling deep into the trench of Arqua.
Involuntary jerks due to anxiety-filled reality.

I guess this is Love.

Yeah. It must be God’s Love.
Hey, hey. Are you nuts?
God’s love? Amidst of all this shit?!
Darn it.

God’s Love. Absolutely!
God knows that a soldier cannot be made
in times of peace and prosperity.
They are born in battle and catastrophe.

I reckoned second best to this awful ordeal.
Stinged by melancholy and defeat.
I beckoned a life of a jinx.
Flailing uncontrollably.

“I’m now working at Trend Micro in Libis, how about you?”
- Joms San Gabriel
GC - Batch 4Q - 2007 - August.

If we had just finished this Thesis on time.

So sad…

Now. What now? Well, I’m just doing the things i ought to do.
Studying for my certification exam. Boo! Can i pass that exam?
Miserable Jonjon is on the gallows of fornication and despair
It’s like everyday is the same. So mundane. So… sad.

Haay… buhay. Emancipation? Yeah, It had finally come through.
But not completely. A bulging thesis is still in my itinerary.
I’m going insane if i keep this pain on myself.
I know, why don’t I put my distress on paper? on multiply? err,,

Erratic. An erratic guy who loves to ameliorate anyone in the perimeter.
Sigh, what now? Well i guess i should say goodbye for now.
It’s another day tommorow. Another day waiting for me to adore!
God’s love is in me, through his word: the Bible.

I’m pressed but not crushed.
Persecuted not abandoned.
Struck down but not destroyed.
I am blessed beyond the curse
His promise will endure
His joy will gonna be my strength.

For a sorrow may last for a night
His joy comes in the morning.

I’m trading my sorrows.
I’m trading my shame.
I’m trading them down,
with the joy of the Lord.

I’m trading my sickness
I’m trading my pain
I’m trading them down
With the joy of the Lord.

Yes Lord, Yes Lord Yes, Yes Lord.

Amen. So be it.

Prayer. Aghast! The mainstream of my Christianity is offline.
Without it, my adversary will devour me and eat my raw flesh.
Adultery of my eyes is indeed a hard sin to overcome.
I’m now under the authority of Lucifer, the Angel of Light.

God, i know I’m a sinner. I had made wrong decisions all over again.
I’m trading my pain, sorrows and sickness to You.
Help me to regain my composure and experience re-birth.
Give me a pure heart ready to obey your commandments.

Hey,,, Why should i obey your commandments?
I like it my way. I’m not abound in you in anyway.

Why? Well, You should obey. Because happy is the man who obeys the law.
If you steal, you’ll get caught sooner or later.
If you lied, the truth will unravel on the day you least expected.
If you quit, you’ll never have the dreams you want.

Prayer, Bible Readings, Praise, Worship, Meditation and Sleep.

I should do these things. I need to cope with this dilemma or else.

God, please help me.